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Eleven years ago today, my mom passed away after a six year battle with breast cancer. She was an incredible woman. My hero.

My mom had a pretty challenging life. Her father struggled with alcohol issues. Sober, he was an amazing man. Drunk, he wasn’t a lot of fun to be around. As the oldest child, she saw the differences first hand.

At sixteen, she got pregnant and left home. Even though she was a very intelligent person, she dropped out of school to raise her firstborn, my brother. She had two more children that she gave up for adoption. And then she had me and my sister while with my dad. Then, my dad went to prison. My mom was twenty one, trying to raise three children, and living on welfare.

And yet, she never gave up.

As I grew up, I would enjoy many conversations with my mom. One of her favourite sayings to me was, “There are two kinds of people in this world: victims and over-comers. You decide which one you’ll be.”

She decided to be an over-comer. She went from being a high school dropout to being within a single course of getting a Bachelor of Political Science from the University of Ottawa. She would have finished those studies if it had not been for cancer.

Around 1981, my mom began a search for meaning in her life. She had remarried to my step-father and had taken up a love of motorcycling. She had a great job at the City of Ottawa and life seemed to be pretty good. And yet, she felt empty inside. In the Spring of 1982, she attended a church service and never turned back. That summer, she forced us children to attend church with her, and for that, I am so very grateful.

My mom was my biggest cheerleader. From the moment I told her that I wanted to go to Bible College and become a minister, she stood with me.

I was her favourite preacher. She would challenge me, encourage me, laugh with me, and believe in me.

My mom believed strongly in family. She raised my brother, sister, and I told hold those same values. She taught the three of us to love books and to enjoy a good intellectual discussion. Stupid people annoyed her and she pushed all three of us to believe in ourselves.

My mom faced cancer with a confidence that came from the depth of her faith in God. Her confidence in God was an inspiration to Heather and I when our daughter passed away (I’ll be sharing about her death in just under a week, on that anniversary).

Heather and I moved back to Ottawa a month before my mom passed away. We came home to help my siblings care for my mom. In fact, mom moved into the house that Heather and I rented. At the time, Heather and I had no idea what we were going to do, but we knew that we needed to honour my mom by being here to help in her care. We were home only a few weeks when I took her into the hospital because of some test results. It would be the only time I would take her to the hospital during her entire sickness. She was admitted and passed away a week later.

During her final week, she would slip in and out of consciousness. The last conversation she had with me was while we were alone. She woke up and looked at me and smiled. “I’m ready, Rob,” She said, her voice barely a whisper. “I’m ready to go home. I’m going to take K.D. into my arms and hold her for you. I’m lucky, I get to have time with her before the rest of you join us. Just Grams and K.D.”

Yeah, she was, and is, my hero.

A lot of people struggle with the passing of a loved one. Years later, they still find the anniversary of their death to be a difficult day. They battle with the agony of the loss for many, many years. They grieve like people who have no hope (see 1 Thessalonians 4:13).

I don’t struggle on this day. Sure, I miss my mom. Yes, I have no doubt that she would be a regular member of Bikers’ Church if she were still alive. Of course I wish she could be around to enjoy every moment with my family. But I don’t grieve because I know the day is coming when I will see her again. The Bible promises that reunion is coming.

At the same time, I know that she is cheering me on. She’s watching my family and loving everything that she sees. She watches my sister and brother and their families as well. In Hebrews 12:1 speaks about a great cloud of witnesses, and I believe that our loved ones get to celebrate our lives from Heaven. She is, and always will be, with us.

So, mom, give K.D. a hug for us. Know that we love you.

Today, we honour you.

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